Squannacook River Goddess

On the gorgeous day that was yesterday, I had the opportunity to go canoeing with Dean and Pumpernickel on my lovely Squannacook River. She is a winding and slow moving river in North Central, MA whom I have claimed as my personal goddess...

She has so much to teach me...

• Go with the flow.
• Take your time, and carve your own path through this earthly plane.
• Pick up new things on your journey, and leave behind what is no longer needed.
• Give freely of your abundance and support a diversity of life.
• When faced with an obstacle, you have many options: you can go around it, or you can go under it, or you can go over it. With enough determination and force, you can move it. And with patience, you can slowly wear it away.
• There are times and places to run shallow, and times and places to run very deep.
• There are times to move slowly and calmly, there are times to move with exuberance - skipping and hopping and making a little song as you go, and there are times to be very still and silent.

I would love to live like a river flows, carried along by the surprise of its own unfolding...

~ John O'Donohue 1956 - 2008

But I also know that in places, the river still runs deep, and though I've floated in these places, it hasn't revealed itself in such obvious ways. I know that it might be months - years, even - before I understand what it has to teach me. I still need to give myself over to the flow and pattern and rhythm of it to learn its lessons and hear its messages. The river is inside me now, I know, and I need only wait and see where the current takes me, and what lies beneath it

~ Jeff Wallach, What the River Says

My Squannacook River is a very wise goddess indeed!

In Memory of My Dad

Dad sitting in the sand at Salisbury Beach


Normand Joseph Bernier
Jan 6, 1934 - Mar 29, 2009

I did not have the closest, warmest relationship with my Dad. In fact, I knew very little about him and I am sure that he did not really know very much of anything about me other than the most superficial facts about my life.

I do know that just about more than anything, he liked to be home. He did not care for travel, and on the rare occasion that he was away from home for more than a day, he was always restless to get back.

In the last year of his life, he spent a lot of time away from home. He was very unwell with a multitude of chronic health problems including diabetes, that resulted in a leg amputation followed by complications that left him in and out of hospitals, ICUs, rehabs, and nursing homes. We (my Mom and siblings) finally managed to get him home with hospice and take care of him for the last few days of his life. I am very grateful that we were able to give him this gift of care and comfort.

He had a few good days at home before making his final descent.

On one of the last days that he was alert and able to speak, he told me that he liked the beach - that he liked the feeling of the wind that he got there... And so, that is where I will try to remember him...